Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
