Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
