I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
