Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
