apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
My bed smells like the plague
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
