my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
just found out that she named her cat after me.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
