I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
