I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
i would one night stand the shit outta him
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize