sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Randomize
