I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize