Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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