I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
