Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Randomize