if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
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