This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
