How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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