Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
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