Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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