The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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