just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
