He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
