He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize