I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
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