Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
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