he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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