OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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