the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
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