i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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