Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Randomize
