wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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