i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
They took my balls.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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