hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
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