Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize