By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Randomize
