I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Randomize