I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
there is another microwave in the elevator.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
