we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I just forgot I was standing up.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Randomize
