I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Randomize
