We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
