Ambien. No doubt about it.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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