I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Randomize
