Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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