remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
