The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Randomize
