dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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