Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I smell stomach acid.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
