You work out of a Hotel?
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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