i don't like sucking hair
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
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