How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
