If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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