Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
